Noticing something is bigger...

It's finally starting to sink in. And, I'm finally starting to see change.

97 days ago I started on Weight Watchers. I decided I was tired of feeling tired.

Tired of being ashamed everywhere I went.

Tired of taking so much medication. 

Tired of hiding from life.

In the three months since I snapped the picture on the left, I've experienced many things.

Enthusiasm
Frustration
Hope
Despair
Anger
Elation

For the past two weeks, to say I hit a low point would be an understatement. I've been on the wagon (so to speak) all along, but felt like the work was getting nowhere. The lower number on the scale meant little to me. When would I see a change?

I've felt the change since the first few weeks of this journey.

More energy
Better sleep
Better mood
Easier to move around

All incredible things. Yet, I felt discouraged and frustrated.

I've cried more in the past week or so than I have in a long time. 

Self doubt. Self pity. 

But I would not give into self sabotage. Not this time.

And then something happened this morning.

After my morning workout, I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror. 

Do I actually look a little smaller? Is that the hint of a waist? More curve in my lower back? Perhaps a 1/2 chin less?

I stared for a moment and decided to snap a picture.

The difference between the two photos above isn't just in how I look. My brain is also changing.

In the first picture, my brain half-assed thought that I could do this. I've tried so many times before. 

In the second picture, my brain was thinking: "That was a good workout this morning. I feel good! I'm making good choices. I'm coming back later because I like how this feels."

Recognizing change is difficult — especially for me. But, I'm embracing the changes, both inside and out. And, that's what I'm going to use to build on as move onto the next day, month and years. 

The little changes do, in fact, add up to something bigger. 

Imagine being happy about seeing something bigger during this weight loss journey! HA! That's one bigger thing I'm happy to have.

See you after weigh in tomorrow!