Transformation Tuesday: The smaller shirt

In the online universe I affectionally call Weight Watchers World, each Tuesday is #TransformationTuesday. What is that? Well, thousands of people post photos of their transformed (or transforming) bodies. 

Because everyone loves posting their before and after pictures, right? However, many of us are still WIPs (works in progress). So, I like to call them my Before and During shots.

​I only have one before picture, because, well...I couldn't stand being in front of a camera. But, I knew I would want to look back one day to where I was, even if a part of me wants to forget I ever let it get that bad.

Anyway, my #TransformationTuesday pic for today is a little different. Sure, it shows the physical changes from almost 7 months of hard work. But, it also shows a changing view of myself.

This morning, I went into my closet to get something to wear. I immediately grabbed one of my favorite shirts and almost put it on. But, I stopped and looked at it. 

A size 5X.

Now, at my heaviest, this shirt was a little big on me. I've spend the better part of the last few years hiding beneath my clothes. But, today, this shirt looked huge, even on the hangar. 

A few hangers over was a new shirt my husband gave me for Christmas. I wore it right after he gave it to me, but honestly, I felt uncomfortable in it. It is a 3x and it fit. But, it hugged my body. It was gathered on the side. I don't do form-fitting shirts. My motto has always been "Let It Flow!" (insert Disney music here ;) )

Still, something told me to put on the new shirt. 

I discovered my body has a shape beyond round. Wait, what? Yes!

​Oh, there's still plenty of excess curves, bumps and rolls there, but now some of them are in the right places!

I didn't hate what I saw. 

I haven't done much clothes shopping because 1. We're following a new budget (which I'll save for another post) and 2. I plan to not be in new clothes for long, so I hate the thought of spending $$ on it if I'm not going to wear it for a long time. Yes, I know that's a dumb mentality. But, it's how I feel. I'm working on transforming that thinking.

In the past week, I have had more people than ever comment on how great I'm looking. In fact, it feels a little weird. It's kind of like all these months have gone by and then suddenly BAM! Notice me!

I'm learning to accept the compliments with genuine thanks and use it as an opportunity to talk about what "my secret" is. 

But, sometimes the person who does the work is often the last to see the changes. 

Today, I realized the smaller shirt reflects the transformation going on inside my mind. Sure, my body has a long way to go to be healthy. But, learning to accept where it's at and not hide it as much is a necessary part of this life change I'm making. 

I need to come out of hiding. And, today a smaller shirt helped me finally get that.